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made for a God sized dream

if you’re anything like me you have a million to-dos, must dos, and want to dos running through your brain sending you in conflicting directions.  i want to be a great wife, mom, friend, athlete, decorator, house-cleaner, crafter, organizer, pursue my personal dreams, AND get dinner on the table every night.  there’s time for all that, right?  uuuugh, sadly no.  here’s the deal: we can’t do it all.  well, we can try to do it all…but we can’t do it all well.  and far more often we don’t do any of it well.

but we have dreams right?  i think you were made for a God sized dream.  one bigger than you.  bigger than your circumstances, bigger than your strengths and your gifts, bigger than even you can imagine with your limited sight.  i believe the same for me.  and as i work toward it, work through it, let it work in me, i realize that something has to give.  perhaps many things have to give.  i have to decrease some things in order to increase what He is doing in me.  the dream He has been building in me, working through me.  and so i’ve been thinking what i could possibly decrease.  and i know…  but you know when you know that you know what it is but you don’t want it to be that?

……….

so i think: ‘what else could i decrease to increase the dream?’  and…..i don’t hear anything.  ……  okay, i must have lost my train of thought, okay, focus.  ‘what could i decrease to increase this dream?  this reality?  how can i open up space to let this thing grow and develop?’  ……  {nothing}.  and that’s when you know that you knew when you knew that you knew the first moment you knew.  it’s often the thing we don’t want to give up, the thing we cling to the hardest, the thing we think we must have.  there are many things in my life that need adjusting.  many things that keep me out of balance, keep me from increasing in my relationship and fellowship with God and building my God sized dream.  for me, the number one on the list to decrease is my coveted, glorious sleep.

now i’m not saying i need 7 hours or i need to get a full nights rest.  i’m saying i am a sleepER!  my husband and some of my friends and i joke because i always say i’m not really a morning or an evening person…i’m kind of a 2 o’clock kind of girl!  i like to go to bed early and sleep in late, my boys come down at random hours in the night and we end up snuggling together into the morning as late as we possibly can in order to get up and out the door on time.  barely on time.  sometimes not on time…  but as much as i love that time with them, those precious moments in the stillness of the morning, the house quiet and the sounds of my boys deep breathing, the rise and fall of their chests, their peach-fuzz cheeks and perfect heart shape of their lips.  their delicate soft skin and long graceful eyelashes.  holding them in their silence (which is rare these days) and just savoring them.  you know that stale morning breath smell that is just so stinky but you can’t help but love.it.??  i hold them and breathe them and feel like my heart is almost going to burst.  it’s almost impossible for me to even think of giving up!!  and yet.  i know that i know that i know.  it is time.  it is time for me to get up.  time for me to set aside time to be with the Father, to let Him breathe life into me and allow this dream to develop.  His dream.  this God sized dream, for me.  that i decrease me and increase in Him.

ask me how i’m doing tomorrow when i set my alarm clock for the very first time.

what can you decrease to increase your dream?

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sacrifice


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{ 2 comments… add one }
  • Cheryl Smith February 13, 2013, 1:20 am

    I loved your site! Your words really spoke to my heart today. It is SO worth whatever we have to give up (no matter how precious) to savor that one-on-one time with Him each day. I pray that as you make this sacrifice, God gives you extra moments with your precious boys in return. Please feel free to visit my blog, if you’d like, at http://www.cherylsmithministries.blogspot.com. May God’s peace be with you, and may His love light your path!

  • Tammy February 13, 2013, 1:56 am

    thank you cheryl for your prayers in this new process! blessings to you!

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